I have wanted to post on here for the last week but I have had some real issues with my sleep, anxiety and self-esteem. All these things have made it difficult to write anything, even this feels difficult and I apologise.
It’s no news to anyone that I struggle with living my life without regrets and worries. One of my worst traits is that I assume the worst in most situations and I hold myself back because of an excessive amount of fear and doubt. Most of the time, I want to push forwards in life and “sort myself out” but then there is that big part of me that always thinks ‘why bother?” I drive myself crazy believing I am a failure, yet I don’t do much to help myself. And so it goes on and on.
For two weeks I have gone to bed incredibly wound up and managing about 3 or 4 hours of sleep. Despite feeling very tired all day, as soon as I have gotten to bed my head has been filled with all manner of worries. My heart has been pounding away as I have gone over and over how I think I have been living my life all wrong and trying to come up with solutions. After hours of this, I then somehow manage to fall in to a very unsettled sleep.
I am always in a battle with myself. I go through phases where I allow the negative voice within me to win and I have certainly allowed it to during the last two weeks. I just want my mind to settle so that I can sleep properly.
If anyone has some advice for a decent night’s sleep, I would be grateful.